If you’re feeling “ow” instead of “wow” when you have sex, don’t endure physical pain any longer. Even if you’re older, you don’t have to accept dysfunction. Health is always possible at any age. You might have to use more lube and make other adjustments, but to have sex less and less often because it hurts is not the option you want to settle for.

Sex is a misunderstood and taboo topic, even in our overly sexualized and liberal society. Most therapists, unless they are trained as sex specialists, don’t deal with the topic of sex in couples counseling. But are you having a sexually satisfying life with your partner?

A major source of tension for committed couples is the pressure to have the same level of sexual desire. Since no two brains or hearts are alike, it’s not possible: there will always be one partner who has a lower or higher level of desire. The challenge is how to have a satisfying sex life for both partners.

What do you think about your body? Do you have a positive or negative feeling about it? What you think about your body impacts the passion in your marriage.

My husband and I have been on more than a hundred getaways over the last 35 years. These are not trips for sightseeing and tourism. These are purposeful romantic retreats.