If you keep asking, “How can I save my relationship?” the answer is: Stop these 2 habits:
Habit #1: Stop attempting to change your partner.
Example: My husband didn’t like the way I loaded the dishwasher; it wasn’t systematic enough. He used to get upset, since he thought only his way was the right way. Now instead of badgering me, he realizes that two ways of leading the dishwasher can co-exist in one household. He does the dishes his way, and I do them my way. It was impossible and unnecessary to agree to an “our way”. Stopping habit number one is how to save a relationship.
Habit #2: Stop thinking that you have to be in agreement with your partner most of the time.
One half to two-thirds of the time you won’t be, and that’s healthy. Surprisingly enough, thriving relationships aren’t harmonious more than 50% of the time. When you don’t agree with your spouse, it’s normal. Cultivate getting used to being out of sync. Use this time in effective, positive ways to take care of yourself.
Example: I used to sit around and mope when my husband and I weren’t on the same wave length. “Why aren’t we lovely-dovey more of the time” I’d ask myself. Now, I understand that connections and disconnections are both vital parts of a successful marriage.
Are you willing to put a Stop to these habits that are not serving your marriage? If so, you’ll find a way to resolve how to save your relationship.
For one whole day, catch yourself when you’re trying to change your partner and convince him/her to agree with you. These 2 Stops are steps to self-mastery that are guaranteed to improve your relationship.
How did this work for you?